Monday, January 31, 2005

Taco Bell, Midnight, Massive contempt for those around me

I only find myself at Taco Bell around midnight. Usually because it is the only thing open and I can't bring myself to heat that last can of Campbell's tomato soup. Stand in-line at Taco Bell around midnight and never will you hear more inane bullshit in your life. I don't get it. I stand in-line at a lot of places. The grocery store, the coffee shop, but what is it about Taco Bell. Tonight I was stuck between one group debating what Steve Perry did after Journey broke up and another discussing their plans for a gorilla vs. robot party. These are the situations that cause me to question choices I made in life. Did my father have to endure this when he was my age? Did Einstein, Ghandi? How did I get here and why do I keep coming back?

Tuesday, January 25, 2005

upcoming changes

I recently had the epiphany that this site sucks. It offers nothing and lacks any real cultural value. But, changes are coming. No longer will federalcheese posts contain useless information like the fact that I was excited today to receive a new toilet plunger at work. Sidebar: the company that makes the toilet-seat covers for my company is called "Rest Assured." And that the highlight of my day was finding out that a co-worker hit a guy in a wheelchair while playing tennis yesterday. That sort of information is no longer going to be conveyed through this site. There are real problems and issues facing the nation and I intend to join the fight. Ah, who am I kidding? Federalcheese will continue to be as crappy as ever. Sigh.

Sunday, January 23, 2005

the musings of a generation x/y'er

First off, everyone should read Justin Housman's blog on a regular basis. His writings evoke a certain malaise and melancholy that speaks to the predicament of modern life. Secondly, all should read the "commments" to his posts, paying particular attention to those of "Chloe/Brenda/Megan Dove." These two represent everything that is the crushing reality of life in the 21st Century. Thank you Justin Housman. And thank you "Chloe." Keep on, keepin' on.

Wednesday, January 12, 2005

My dear Kanga

This is not a picture of Kanga, the Cockatiel that has been my family's pet for the past 22 years, but all Cockatiels do look alike. My mother had the grim task of putting Kanga to sleep yesterday. Goodnight sweet prince. At his pinnacle, he could whistle Dixie. By the way, I can't remember why we chose the name Kanga, so don't ask.

If you're bored

In the wake of other sites posting best albums and worst movies of the year, I have composed a list of good books federalcheese readers should peruse, if they have not already. This is a simple list of favorites from over the years and they are in no particular order.

  • The Brothers K, by David James Duncan. Justin Housman has a copy.
  • The Metaphysical Club, by Louis Menand. A wonderful book chronicling the world of American philosophy in the 19th Century.
  • White Noise, by Don Delillo. Dark baby, very dark.
  • Annals of the Former World, by John Mcphee. Anything by Mcphee is worth it, but this geological history of the United States is a collection of his best.
  • Confederates in the Attic, One for the Road, Baghdad Without a Map, all by Tony Horwitz. All three are quick, but tremendously fun reads.
  • Inventing the People, by Edmund Morgan. Morgan is one of my favorite historians, always insightful, this book is about the parallel rise of popular sovereignty in England and America.
  • President Kennedy and President Nixon, by Richard Reeves. Magnificent biographies of two presidents' time in office during unique points in history.
  • A Prayer for Owen Meany, by John Irving. Just read it.
  • Currently I am reading Quicksilver by Neil Stephenson. Highly, highly, highly recommended as is Cryptonomicon by the same author
  • And yes, I don't want to hear it, but all five Harry Potter books are a lot of fun.

Wednesday, January 05, 2005

days past

I cut out my cousin Gabe in a previous version of this photo and got shit about it. This is my penitence

Good news SF fans

The welcome news just came in, the 49ers have fired head coach Dennis Erickson and GM Terry Donahue. I know, I know, nobody cares. . .but I do. By the way, here is my projected opening day line-up for the 2005 San Francisco Giants:

1. Durham, 2B

2. Grissom, CF

3. Alfonzo, 3B

4. Bonds, LF

5. Alou, RF

6. Snow, 1B

7. Vizquel, SS

8. Matheny, C

9. (pitcher)

Tuesday, January 04, 2005

In the forefront of coolness

Why does everyone choose the blog template that this site employs? Because Federalcheese sets the standard that all others struggle to meet. Keep trying.